MORE PROTESTS: Protests in Butler County: More scheduled through this weekend
“It has to be now,” said Pitts, who has served as a school psychologist at the Highview Sixth Grade Center in the Middletown City School District for three years. “I didn’t want them bombarded with statements that don’t follow my teachings.”
Pitts said she didn’t want her children getting their information online.
“Can’t shield them,” she said. “Children are going to see it on social media.”
Credit: Nick Graham
Credit: Nick Graham
As a way to “break the ice,” Pitts suggested parents ask their children if they have any thoughts about race relations and what they have heard from their friends. She said parents also should monitor whether the violent protests have created any anxiety or depression with their children.
“These are very interesting times,” she said.
Unrest is sweeping the nation in the wake of the death of George Floyd, who died May 25 after lying handcuffed on the street in the custody of Minneapolis police officers, one of whom held his knee on Lloyd’s neck for nearly nine minutes.
Pitts was asked whether she believes parents should take their children to some of the race rallies being held throughout the region. There has been little violence locally, which hasn’t been the case at some of the demonstrations in larger cities.
MORE PROTESTS: The week of Butler County protests: Marches, chants and calls for change
“You need to make the best decision,” she said. “This will be in the history books. I don’t blame parents if they want their children to see history first-hand.”
Pitts, who is black, said talking about racism is familiar to many black parents, but local experts said it’s critical all children learn about it early in life.
“The best thing we can do is be honest with them,” said Helen Jones-Kelley, executive director of the Montgomery County Board of Alcohol, Drug Addiction and Mental Health Services. “If we start raising all of our children early on to understand social injustice and racism and to help them understand why it isn’t right, then we will be able to finally get past some of this.”
Experts said listening to children and answering their questions in a straightforward, age-appropriate way is key to helping kids make sense of what is happening and to ease the fears they might have.
“What’s important with any age child is that you give them the opportunity to talk to you about what they’ve seen. You ask them questions. What do you think is happening? What did you notice? How are you feeling?” said Shauna Dilworth, clinical supervisor of the Young Children’s Assessment and Treatment Services program at Samaritan Behavioral Health Inc.
Cheryl Riley, a therapist who works for Beech Acres Parenting Center in Cincinnati, which delivers mental health services for kids in Warren County, said before parents can address race with their children they need to explain the importance of “human dignity, respect and compassion” for each other.
“Start from there and then explain how race makes things different here in America,” said Riley, who has two grown children.
There is no certain age when it’s appropriate to discuss race issues with your children, according to Riley. Parents need to gauge their kids’ maturity and ability to grasp the concept.
But she warned: “Don’t wait until something happens.”
Parents should talk with their kids openly and be honest with them as appropriate for their age level, said John Cummings, deputy director of communications for Mental Health Recovery Board serving Warren and Clinton counties.
He said kids may ask a lot of questions about what’s happening and why there are so many people marching. Parents may be able to use those questions to ask their kids about their feelings on the subject, he said.
He also recommended using the events as a teachable moment, explaining that race and inequality are “very real concerns” for people, and they are trying to get a point across by marching.
Signs that a child is traumatized and may need professional help include:
Comments about wanting to be dead.
Withdrawal from activity.
New fears the child previously did not have, such as fear of going outside or of police officers.
Trouble sleeping or nightmares.
Overeating or not eating.
Escalated or out of control behavior.
Difficulty concentrating or remembering.
Frequent headaches or stomachaches.
